Saturday, August 27, 2005

Here is another million dollar idea. You can have it for free.

I have a photograph for a desktop background. I took the photograph. It is nice. It depicts a waterway north of San Francisco near Point Reyes at twilight.

Problem is, the photograph never changes.

What needs to happen is the photograph needs to change according to the time of day: at night it needs to be dark with moonlight, in the daytime it needs to be brightly lit. Etc.

Go make millions on that idea & get back to me. Give me a roll of quarters I can guiltlessly blow at Harrah's next time I'm in Vegas. Dig?

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Under pressure from my branding counsellor, I changed the template of this blog.

All my links are now blown away. Good suggestion, counsellor.

People wonder why I drive a filthy car with a jimmied starter, no AC, no heater, no stereo, and a cracked windshield.

People wonder why I shrug when they point out coffee stains on my faded, stretched T-shirts.

People wonder why I don't give a fuck about getting a haircut.

Or changing my bed.

Or doing the dishes.

Or why I don't think $60 on flowers for my wife earns me a good return.

Or why I don't care if a number fell off of my 4 digit address.

Or my license plate is dangling by a single, rusted screw.

Or the filthy, spidery sliding door in the basement is off-limit to sponges.

Its not that I don't give a fuck, which I often don't.

Its just that sometimes good enough ought to be left alone.

Take the template for this blog:

The whole reason my image guy suggested I change it is because in my summer hiatus a 6 inch gap of white appeared between the top of the blog and where the words started.

I didn't make that change.

I just left the blog alone for a few weeks and when I came back, the change was there.

It broke itself.

Swear to god.

Story of my life.

So if it broke itself, why not try to fix it, Clay?

Cause it was only half-broke, that's why.

It was good enough.

But now instead of an annoying white spot at the top, I'm missing all the links to my friends and fellow bloggers.

I'll never earn my $37,000 for an airstream.

My album won't go platinum.

Etc.

Plus, now my blog is pink.

Thanks, counsellor.

Jackass.